The Midnight World by Jordan
As I entered the brand new world I saw a house which looked like my house, so much so that my feet floated and slowly drifted towards the house uncontrollably. My body pushed into this house where I met my granddad! Who then suddenly disappeared, in front of my very eyes. A shadow slowly drifted by. I moved around the room to see what was around; I ran up stairs.
I knew I was no longer in Southampton – the house was the same as mine but something wasn’t quite right. It was as if we were being manipulated by a mysterious person. Suddenly something hit me on the back of my head and I woke up in my bed. I pinched myself to see if I was dreaming.
My head was throbbing but it was my feet I was worried about – they seemed to move by themselves as if I was possessed by a ghost. I wanted to get out of there but my feet wouldn’t move so I shouted at the top of my voice, “HELP! HELP!” There was no reply even though it echoed through the house.
My feet sprinted off towards the door but it slammed shut. Suddenly I remembered what had happened the night before. A shadow drifted past. Was I in a dream or was this real?
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3 comments:
Wow! Fantastic writing! Loved the build up of tension - excellent stuff. Can I use it with my Y6 class - it'll really inspire them to write
Well done Jordan!
Jordan, you really had me sitting on the edge of my chair!!!!!
I was gripped.
Rachel Orr
Opera Diva
I showed your writing to my class today - they all agreed you are an amazing writer - we loved your ideas and language - and all agreed that you could be the King of suspense!!! Keep writing!!
dazza d
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